Considering how things ended between us, I didn't think it was appropriate for me to email or call you today and wish you a Happy Birthday, so I am doing it here. If you happen to see this (I doubt you still look at my blogs) and want me to remove it, I will.
Thank you for putting up with me for four years. I know I'm extremely high maintenance and was a whining, moody, complaining, bitchy handful at times, but you somehow had the patience to endure it. You were also there for me through some of the worst and most difficult times of my life: the separation from my husband, the pain and stress of losing my house, the huge transition I faced moving to Brooklyn, my divorce, my alopecia (you stayed up for hours to talk to me on the phone the night I realized I was losing my hair), the death of my beloved cat Smokey just days after I moved to Brooklyn, and you came to the hospital with me to visit my friend Rasha who had been struck by a car while riding her bike. I didn't have the strength to go alone. You came with me, and that was the last time I saw her alive.
You were with me when I was 200 pounds and as I lost weight, getting down to 150, and saw me everywhere in between. Somehow you thought I was beautiful at every point, even though I did not.
Here are just some of the times with you and things about you that I will never forget-
When we appeared in the New York Post last year (and how you called Fred Flare to get my message on their board):
Your unbelievably amazing apartment (complete with two rotary phones and a pull chain toilet):
Being the best dressed couple anywhere we went:
Being with you at the Rainbow Room the night Obama was elected:
Halloween 2008:
Halloween 2007:
Your band performing at the Atlantic Antic, 2008, and touring the vintage buses:
Visiting the Christmas Tree in Rockefeller Plaza and going for a cocktail at the Campbell Apartment in Grand Central Terminal:
Your Christmas parties:
The hundreds of times I watched your band (and *still* loved your songs) and getting to be "Raffle Girl":
Christmas 2005, walking around the East Village with you:
Visiting your hometown of Pittsburgh with you and your family:
You coming to see me at the Mode Merr fashion shows:
New Year's Eve 2005 with you:
"Worst. Tour. Ever." at Brooklyn Brewery:
Other memories I will cherish are those of the parties at your place, watching and hearing your band, riding my bike to the East River to see you play softball, walking back to your place and cutting through Tompkins Square Park just so we could look at the little dogs in the doggie run, the morning my car got towed and we had to get it back, visiting your job and enjoying all the snacks, the road trip to Canada with your band, visiting the Kwik-E-Mart in Times Square, or just hearing about your crazy projects and ideas (did you ever get that ham to descend from the heavens?) and coming to visit and finding something like this going on:
I've never met anyone like you and I'm quite certain no one like you exists. You are unbelievably smart and talented - a great songwriter, impressive guitarist, wonderful illustrator, gifted craftsmen, stylish gentleman, a generous host and all around really wonderful man.
I am sorry I am no longer part of your life and am missing this milestone today, your 50th birthday. You may not believe it, but I am sorry for how things ended and how much I hurt you. I sincerely hope you have a great day and fantastic life. You deserve it.
With love,
Sheryl
17 comments:
A really great thought... :)
This was a bittersweet post. Sometimes when you continue to think fondly of the person you lost it hurts even more.
Ah, such a beautiful ode to Michael. I only met him once, but he is so memorable. Awesome guy, and awesome post.
This is such a beautiful post. I think we all have those people in our lives that we think of at certain times, even though we can't or shouldn't contact them. Thank you for sharing yours with us.
That's such a sweet and honest birthday message/gift.
I can't imagine why he would want you to take it down...
it's nice to remember all the good times that you had...sounds like you were both lucky have crossed paths and stayed there for as long as you did....not too many people experience that.
Wow. This made me teary eyed. I too still think of someone I lost *and it was totally my fault*
isn't sad when you no longer speak with someone that was si much apart of your life? bittersweet
Great pictures. I'm curious as to why the article was in The Post. Was it just a random article, special occasion?
Michael looks eerily like John Waters. This was a nice, thoughtful post.
We live our lives in chapters. Sometimes they overlap. Sometimes they don't. And other times we wish we could reread them.
Like a Billy Holiday tune that wraps itself around a memory, I fins myself looking back, with whimsy, upon times...
Y'all certainly look like you belong together... let us know whether you decide to call him! If nothing else, he needs to read your tribute to him.
you maybe sad but its his loss.
That was a lovely post Sheryl.
I for one missed you last Thursday...
Thank was the most beautiful memory of a loved one and a bitter sweet breakup. It will get better for you and new doors will open and you will meet that soul mate you deserve who will be as special as Michael and better.
Beautiful, heartfelt post, Sheryl. I hope Michael read it. xoxoxo
hello i read your another blog
*Bitch Cakes*: A Neurotic Glamour Girl's Weight Watchers Experience and Fitness Adventures
for a while and then i found this one , this note, you are an amazing person
stay like that and thanx!
a fan from france
stéphanie
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